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You know, I'm a television personality. It's not like I'm a famous hooker or something!

What you need to do is compartmentalize--that’s what people who are talented and disturbed do.

The future Brett Somers
17 April 1982
3-south, adam toyota carolla, adrien brody, adult swim original programming, akiva schaffer, alvin and the chipmunks, american movie, amy sedaris, apple computers, art alexakis, avidd pades, bamboo shoots, barenaked ladies, bears, beloved nbc sitcom wings, bill murray, billywitchdoctor.com, bob newhart, bottle rocket, breaking into your house, brian bell, brian posehn, bulletproof legs, cautionary tales of swords, charles nelson reilly, cheers, clem snide, clue, cold steak, college university, crafts, daler mehndi, dan ashcroft, darkplace, david letterman, david shrigley, davy grohlton, demetri martin, dj qualls, dolemite, dollar yeast infection medicine, domokun, dr. steve brule, ed glosser: trivial psychic, emo phillips, eric cartman, everclear, fake purse ninjas, foaming soap containers, fred willard, french fries, fried mochi, funnyman harry connick jr., game and watch gallery, george harrison, get smart, gravy, group x, gund, hard 'n phirm, harland williams, hatten ar din, headline news, heat vision and jack, hermits, hilariously lame snl sketches, himeguma, i was saying boo-urns..., jeff goldblum, jim gaffigan, jim tavaré, jim's journal, joe pera, julian barratt, ken "the falconer" mortimer, kuki sanban, leopold "butters" stotch, liam lynch, literal beards, literal muffin tops, lost in translation, lyle lovett, maakies, magnet-crotch-and-iron-face, mark borchardt, martin mull, max raabe, mc chris, mcdonalds picante sauce, mike schank, miso soup, mitch hedberg, monmo, muppet babies, nagi noda, ned and stacey, noel fielding, norm macdonald, orville willis forte iv, owen "butterscotch stallion" wilson, paper mario, paul bettany, peter yowza, petey wheatstraw, pinocchiocchiocchioccho, pokey the penguin, presidentsoftheunitedstatesofamerica, psyduck, pumpkin pie milkshakes, puppet pals, purin, rap reiplinger, rats off to ya'!, rice, richard ayoade, san-x, sanrio, snorlax, snuffles, soup, space ghost, steve burns, strangers with candy, stuffed animals, super furry animals, television, tenacious d, the it crowd, the justice friends, the life aquatic, the mighty boosh, time cube, tintin, tom arnold, tom petty, toothpaste for dinner, trailer park boys, two stupid dogs, underwear, upright citizens brigade, utica cartoon, very bad things, wes anderson, wesley willis, william howard taft, yoku moku cookies, zach galifianakis, zashikibuta, zombie & mummy, マリちゃん